


Make this go on forever

by Startanewdream



Series: Missing Moments [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Book 6: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Canon Compliant, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:07:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23634340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Startanewdream/pseuds/Startanewdream
Summary: Glimpses through Ginny Weasley's mind during the last months of her fifth years at Hogwarts. Missing scenes from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.
Relationships: Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley
Series: Missing Moments [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2107683
Comments: 4
Kudos: 64





	Make this go on forever

**Author's Note:**

> This story is a translation/adaptation of a story I wrote originally years ago. Hope you still enjoy!

****

I.

****

  


Hermione is laughing in a very strange way. It is very silly, very happy. It’s getting on my nerves, mainly because the scene is all wrong. She should be trying to comfort me for breaking up with my boyfriend, she should be advising me to focus on my exams, and, above all, she should not be laughing like a silly teenager or – or – _giggling like Lavender Brown._  


“Hermione”, I call her seriously. “You are better than this. So please could you stop laughing?”  


She doesn’t, of course. There are now real tears shining on her eyes and not for the first time I wish Lavender Brown wasn’t such a sensitive topic for us so I could just tell her who she is reminding me of.  


“I need to finish my essay”, I try. “I have exams in June, remember?”  


But not even the perspective of me failing my exams makes her stop laughing, which kind of worries me since this is the girl who lectured me all year to take my studies seriously. She gifted me a _homework planner_ , for Merlin’s sake. She is the one person (not counting Mum) that I always expect to worry about my education.  


“If you don’t stop laughing, I will tell Ron who exactly was featured on your Patented Daydream Charm”.  


My threat works perfectly. I feel just a little ashamed of playing low when she blushes, looking mortified.  


“How did you know?” 

“Well, you never told me how the charm worked for you, so I guessed – I mean, you weren’t going to tell me exactly how my brother looks in a pirate costume, which I am grateful for, by the way. So - now can you please explain to me why me breaking up with my boyfriend makes you laugh?” 

Hermione smiles again. 

“Oh, that was repressed laughter. I’ve been waiting for _ages_ to tell you, it’s so amusing!” 

I wait for her to continue, feeling more restless each second. 

“Hermione? What is the joke?” 

“It is not a joke! It is serious”. 

That doesn’t make any sense, and I wonder if maybe Hermione had an Essence of Madness or, as Ron always said she might, she finally lost it. 

“But you were laughing –“

“Yes, but not because of what I _know._ I was just happy that I’ve been right all along”. 

I just roll my eyes. 

“Hermione, you are always right, what’s new about it?” 

“It is just I wasn’t actually sure”, she admits, looking embarrassed. “It is always been very likely, but you know – Harry can be so _blind_ sometimes”. 

“He does wear glasses”, I answer immediately, because I don’t want to miss the joke. And then I fully register what she has just said. “And what does Harry have to do with any of this?” 

“Hmm?”, Hermione murmurs, looking guilty. 

“I mean, what has Harry to do with you laughing this way just after I told you I broke up with Dean?” When she doesn’t answer, I continue: “You are very strange today. For starters, wasn’t you supposed to calm me down and advise me to make peace with Dean?” 

Hermione looks surprised. 

“And why would I do that?” 

“That’s what you did on our last fight, after the Quidditch Game”, I say, feeling odd to remember Hermione of anything. “You told me it was not worth to have a fight over a silly thing, that we were good together…”

“The circumstances were different”, she explains, in the same voice she would explain a Transfiguration essay. “I think you and Dean had a great relationship, but it wasn’t meant to be forever. You told me yourself”. 

So, her memory _is_ perfect. 

“And anyway”, she continues, with thehappy silly smile back in her face, “he is not the only guy in the world”. 

Again, I wait for her to continue, but she just stares at me, like when she is waiting for me to have the answer for a particularly difficult test. Except this time, I truly don’t know what she is implying. 

“I wasn’t considering another relationship so soon”, I say, remembering all the books I still must read for the exams. “One this year has been exhausting enough”. 

“Well, maybe the exhaustion is related to the person, not the relationship”. 

I can’t disagree with Hermione about this – but then again, concerning relationships, I think she is the best advisor. It was so when she first advised me to move on with my life, meet other people, be more of myself, without needing to blush furiously whenever I saw _him_. And she is probably right this time as well, because my problem was more with Dean Thomas than being in a relationship. I like what relationships bring – the companionship, holding hands, dates, snogging, but I just don’t want to be with someone who needs to be a perfect good gentleman every second – 

And then I am back to the beginning: Hermione is laughing. 

“Hermione?” 

“Tell me I am right”. 

“You know you are, so why do I need to say it?” 

She sighs exaggeratedly. 

“Because you are going to deny, as soon as I tell you what I’ve discovered”. 

I look at her, encouraging her to continue. She glances around, confirming no one can hear us, takes a deep breath, and says: 

“Harry likes you”. 

I blink. 

“I know…?”, I say, confused. Harry and I are friends, he talks to me, we play quidditch together, and after all these years of knowing each other, I would even consider him a close friend. And friends _like_ each other. 

“No, no, you didn’t understand. I mean like as in with all the hearts and _attraction_ and desire. Harry _fancies_ you”. 

For one instant, one long instant, my treacherous mind replaces Hermione’s face and then I can see Harry smiling, green eyes shining, telling me he fancies me. An image of my most treasured dream, except I have woken up a long time ago. 

“You are wrong”, I whisper, when I feel confident my voice will not shake. Her smile does not falter. 

“I am not”, she says, confidently. “I have been waiting weeks to tell you”. 

“You are not right, but just because I am curious, why did you wait?” 

“I didn’t want to influence you. You were with Dean, and it was not fair that Harry could disturb your like after all this time. Funny how things turn out, but -”

“It is not fair”, I agree. “But why are you reviving this story? I will not go back to be that girl with a crush on him!” 

“Of course you will not”, Hermione interrupts, outraged. “It is not with that girl that Harry is in love with”. 

_In love_. Every second the feeling is growing, and I don’t think I can handle this now. Or ever. 

“Can you just drop it?”, I try, sounding desperate. 

“Why would I do that?” 

“Because it is impossible for Harry to fancy me!” 

The look she gives me says it clearly that is not impossible. I feel like screaming. _Of course_ it is impossible. There is no reasonable reason for Harry to start fancying me. I am kind of the same person he has known for a while. And even if I do speak in front of him now, that’s been going for two years now. What is the difference from last year? Except…

“Harry’s eyes are much more open now he is not so concerned with Cho Chang’s opinion”, Hermione observes, like if she has just read my mind. “Open enough so he can see new people”. 

“I am not someone _new_ ”.

“Well, to him, you kind of are. Someone who is not afraid of Harry Potter. Someone who has charmed Harry”. 

I can’t help rolling my eyes. 

“That is so absurd”. 

“First of all, you are a girl, Harry likes girls, so it was always possible”, she answers impatiently. “Second, you are beautiful, and even if Harry took a while to notice it, he does find you attractive. Third, you speak with Harry, he answers you, so you talk… which is more than he and Cho ever did. You spent a lot of time together this summer”. 

“As much as you and Ron”, I say nervously. 

“Yes, but I don’t see Harry looking all hopeless to me or to Ron. My point is that in these past two years, you and Harry got to know each other, for real. It was more than enough time for you to become Ginny Weasley for him, and not just Ron’s sister”. 

I frown. 

“But that’s what I will always be for him. His best friend’s little sister. The girl he rescued, the one with the crush…”

“The one who cuts him when he starts being stupid”, she interrupts me. “The one that did not accept to be left behind last year. The one who plays Quidditch as good as him, and who makes him laugh better than anyone I’ve ever see.” She sighs. “When are you going to see yourself? You grew up, Ginny, and Harry knows it. I think he fancies you because of this. Just think about it for a minute”. 

Her words bring the memory of another night, when we were sitting by the fire on the Gryffindor Common Room just like now. I remember we were discussing the Yule Ball, and though I was glad to go with Neville, I just couldn’t shake the feeling of unhappiness of missing the chance of going with Harry; I could have agreed to go with him – 

“Harry doesn’t know what he is missing not going with you”, Hermione told me suddenly, looking me closely. I smiled grateful for the comfort, but she just shook her head. “No, I really mean it. Harry _doesn’t know_ because he does not _know you_ ”.

“Of course he knows me”. 

“No, he doesn’t. You are a completely different person when he is around, and you have no idea how annoying this is. I really think you and Harry would have a lot in common, and only if he could see it… But you don’t let him see it, you just hide yourself when he is around”. 

“It’s just – I don’t – I wish he would notice me, but I don’t know why he would”. 

“You need more confidence. You need to get on with your life, know other people, relax a bit around Harry. You can’t stay running from him forever”. 

“I don’t know - ” 

“Just give a try at the Yule Ball, ok? I think you will be happy on the long run. Just think about it for a minute”.

Ok, just like I did last time, I will try to think about it. Let me pretend Hermione is right. Let me say that all those smiles and laughs we shared over the summer weren’t just us strengthening our friendship but starting a blossoming romance. Or that Harry seemed really disappointed when I told him I was not going to sit with him in the Hogwarts Express at the beginning of the term. And that look on his face, after Harry found me and Dean snogging in the corridor, that weird look that I couldn’t identify because he had never looked at me that way - It was _jealousy_.

And then suddenly everything fits into pieces of a jigsaw I never really expect to finish. Harry’s smile when I was decorating the Christmas tree. That unexpected hug after the first Quidditch game. The way he never seemed comfortable if Dean was around me. The underlining _teasing_ in our talks. 

I look furiously at Hermione, while my heart beats faster. 

“Why did you put those thoughts on my head? Now _everything_ Harry has ever done seems like he really fancies me. Even the way he says good morning - “

“It’s because it is”, she notes implacably. “Harry never says it for me or for Ron, and you don’t see walking all the way down the table to say to Neville or Lavender”. She grimaces. “Not that he would need to look for Lavender, she is always close to Ron…”

“Not anymore, I think”, I reply, and for the sake of our friendship I choose not to mention the way Hermione seems delightfully happy at this news. “They seemed to be fighting really serious tonight, as much as me and Dean… Well, tonight was a bad night for romance”. 

“Pretty bad luck, wouldn’t you say?”, she asks nonchalantly, in the same voice she uses when she knows something important and won’t tell me much. 

“Bad luck?” 

“Yeah, just think about it, how was your fight with Dean? What was it about?” 

“I know it seems stupid”, I defend myself immediately. “But it was the fifth time he helped me through the Portrait Hole, even though I asked him not to, and if he can’t understand I am a grown capable woman…”

“But wouldn’t it be weird if it wasn’t Dean that pulled you this time?” 

I glance at her, uncertain. 

“It would”. 

“The person would have to be invisible… and would have to be very lucky to pass through the Portrait Hole at the exactly same time you two would be returning”. 

“Invisible like under an Invisibility Cloak?” 

“And lucky as in just having swallowed Felix Felicis”. 

“The lucky potion that Harry won?”, I ask, and then I blink when I fully understand what she is saying. “Oh”. 

Hermione giggles again. 

“Harry is the luckiest person tonight, the same night you happen to end your relationship”. 

“That is just a coincidence”, I try feebly. “You know my relationship was going to end any day soon…”

“But it happened tonight, five minutes after Harry had all the luck in the world in his favor”, she concludes triumphantly. 

“Bloody hell”, I swear loudly, making Hermione jump. “As crazy as it seems, I think you are right”. 

She glances me calmly, her eyes saying, “I told you”. Despite her confidence, I feel the start of a panic attack. 

“What do I do now?”, I ask. 

“Nothing for now, I think. If I am not wrong, as soon as Harry knows you and Dean have split, he is going to ask you out… Well, as soon as he decides he will face Ron”. 

“Ron?” 

“Oh, you know your brother, so protective and jealous. I think Harry may be under the impression that Ron will automatically hate all your boyfriends”. 

The train ride at the end of last term comes into my mind, and I remember Ron’s advice to choose someone better next time, while the _prat_ kept throwing looks at Harry. 

“But Ron has said quite clearly that he would prefer me with Harry than Dean”. 

“I don’t think Harry notice it, to be honest. I would tell him, but I don’t think that for this matter in particular Harry will ask my help”. 

Considering that Harry will probably avoid Hermione’s giggles this way, I can’t fault him. 

Still, the image of Harry asking me out, on a date, it is so… inconceivable. With Michael things just started, neither of us really knowing how to be on a relationship; Dean and I went to a date, but we weren’t really close friends before. With Harry… I just can’t picture it. 

Nonetheless, I can see him kind of smiling shyly (the way he looks when someone compliments him and he doesn’t know how to react), bright green eyes shining, and telling me that wondrous forbidden phrase: _I like you, Ginny Weasley._

“And what are you going to say?”, Hermione asks, looking intently at me. “When he asks you out”, she adds, when I don’t answer her immediately. “I mean… do you still like him, right?” 

“I am not the same girl who had a crush on Harry Potter”, I say slowly. “And because of that, the best part of getting over a crush, I got to know the real Harry. You know, the one looks more alive when he is flying than when he is fighting Death Eaters, the one who yells and cries and is so _human_. I really like this Harry. This is the one who I still think it is the most gorgeous bloke in this castle - don’t laugh - and he is the one that I still kind of wishes I got to the Yule Ball with”. I take a heavy breath. “So if Harry asked me out? Even after all these years, I would say yes. I don’t know where it would lead us, but this is a chance I am willing to take”. I pause, glancing at Hermione. “Do I look pathetic?” 

Hermione hugs me. 

“No. Just unusually romantic”. I laugh, against my will. “Don’t worry. I am pretty sure things will turn out just fine”. 

I close my eyes and let myself believe it. 

  


**II.**

  


I love the green on Harry’s eyes. There is no denying that Harry’s popularity amongst the girls (and some boys) in the castle have been increased this year, but even before, even during the dark times last year, his eyes have always been a constant in Hogwarts: they are really beautiful. 

I always had a soft spot for Harry, so for me his eyes just fit his face so well. It’s been a long time since the last time I really appreciated Harry’s face, without feeling guilty or like I am cheating someone, and I realize that at some point, Harry became a man. I look at his cheekbones and nose and lips, and I can’t help but think he is handsome, more so by the fact I don’t think he really knows it. 

With a start, I realize I’ve been staring at him for quite some time, and the ice bag in my hand, over the bruise on his forehead, must be burning him by now. Still, Harry doesn’t seem to notice me; he is also looking at me, concentrated, analyzing me as much as I was with him. 

My heart beats faster. 

“Ginny”, he whispers, and somehow my name seems longer in his voice. “I…”

The door of the changing room opens and we both jump. The ice bag drops to the floor and, after I retrieve it, Harry is farther, avoiding looking at me, as he smiles exaggeratedly at Ron. 

“And how is your head, Harry?”, my brother asks lively. 

“Better”, Harry answers simply. 

“You mean as better as you can be after sixteen bludgers”, I reply, and Harry looks embarrassed. 

“Sixteen?”, Ron says, impressed. “Perhaps we should change your position, Harry… But I don’t know how you didn’t see the last one, it flew straight to your head”. 

Harry is turning red, which I can’t help but find it funny. And quite cute. 

“I was distracted”, Harry murmurs, and he glances at me. I have a sudden wish that we were alone in this room, and my imagination is quick to draw scenarios of what would happen. 

Lots of them involve me and Harry kissing against that pillar of wood. 

“Well, you will want to pay more attention in the game”, Ron remembers, and I blush as if he had caught me and Harry kissing. “You will not want to miss the golden snitch”. 

“Harry is the captain, Ron, he knows”. Then I smirk. “Plus, he doesn’t need another scar”. 

“One is more than enough”, Harry agrees, smiling, and it is as if we are back at the Burrow, over the summer, and we are just playing together, without any romantic tension between us. 

Except now that I think about it, I suppose there were always a teasing aspect in our discussions. 

“We need to change. Are you really better?”, Ron says, looking at Harry, who agrees with his head. “Ok, Ginny, get out”. 

“What?”, I ask, annoyed, but Ron seems relentless. 

“We are going to change clothes, you cannot stay here”, he explains, patiently. 

I roll my eyes. 

“I have six brothers, Ron, what it would have here that I’ve never seen before?” 

Ron’s ears turn red, but he doesn’t flinch. 

“Harry”, he answers. My face reddens, but I am as much as stubborn as Ron. 

“And does Harry have something that I’ve never seen before?” 

“I am not your brother”, Harry murmurs, a note of annoyance in his voice, and the anger suddenly leaves my body. 

“I know”, I reply, smiling warmly at him. “It just the way Ron says it -”

Harry smiles back, his eyes shining. 

“He just was being silly”, he assures. 

“Hey!”, Ron exclaims, frowning. “You are taking her side?” 

“If you say it is because I am the weaker side, we are going to have a problem, Harry Potter”, I threaten, and Harry glances from me to Ron looking lost. 

“I - well - just trying to avoid a fight?” 

Ron and I laugh, and after a second Harry join us. Lightheartedly, I start collecting my things to leave, but Harry calls me back. 

“Are you going to wait for m - us. I mean, us, so we can all go back together?” he asks, anxiously. 

I look at him, losing myself happily in his eyes. 

“If you say it’s dangerous to go back alone…”

“You are probably the most dangerous thing out there”, Harry assures. “I just -”, he pauses, collecting himself. “We just like your company”. 

“Say for yourself”, Ron replies, distantly, but this commentary just make Harry’s smile brighten. 

“I will wait”, I promise, and I am grinning happily as the door closes behind me. 

  


**III.**

  


I finish brushing my hair and look at myself in the mirror - everything is ok, considering what is possible to make with a wet hair. I sigh, untroubled, take my broom and leave the changing room, humming a song that I am pretty sure it is a Christmas Carol - which would be fine if we were not in late April – 

“Ops!”, and suddenly I am brought back to reality, when I stumble into someone in the middle of the corridor and fall in the ground. The curse dies at my lips, however, when I find myself staring back at Harry’s green eyes. “Ops”, I say again, but this time my voice does not have any aggression in it. 

“Sorry, I miscalculated it”, he says, embarrassed, extending his hand. I take it and I regret instantly. 

Harry’s hand is warm, strong, and his touch sends a spark of electricity through my body, as if a lightning had just strike me. All feelings that I’ve had so successfully repressed in the last couple of years return to me and, for a moment, I feel like I am 10 years-old again, waiting for him to notice me; except I am not that little girl anymore and my cheeks don’t redden. I feel confident and, above all, I feel everything is right. 

“Just an accident”, I say lightly, smiling, and I can see his eyes following the movement of my lips. 

“It is nice to find you”, Harry murmurs, stepping closer to me almost distracted. “It is so hard to find you alone”. 

My heart beats so fast that I wonder if he can notice it almost jumping from my chest. 

“And why did you need me alone, Harry?”, I ask, without blinking, and he takes a breath. 

“I wish -”

But there are sudden steps coming in our direction and Harry falls back, his hand releasing mine. 

“I wish to suggest one movement that I thought we could use in the next match - oh, hello, Ron”, he adds, as if he had just now seen my brother smiling upon us. 

“Harry! You vanished so fast! I was wondering where you went!” 

And Ron doesn’t seem to notice the look of dismay in Harry’s eyes. 

  


**IV.**

  


It is almost nine in the morning by the time I am finally able to be alone in the Common Room; everyone has left for breakfast, but I stay, trying to collect my thoughts for a moment. It is not exactly easy to play as Chaser all year and, without any training, having to suddenly play as Seeker -

I hear footsteps coming from the male dormitory, but I don’t turn my eyes from the fireplace. Most of the Gryffindors so far have expressed their confidence in me, mostly because of last year, I suppose, but every one of them seems dismayed that Harry will not be able to play. I feel dismay, no doubt. 

Damn book. Damn Malfoy. 

“Life sucks”, I complain, annoyed, throwing a stick in the fireplace just to see the fire cracking. 

“You tell me”. 

That voice automatically makes my heart beats faster. Ignoring this ill-timed feeling, I turn, and I try to smile gently at Harry. 

“Are you going to eat anything?”, he asks, concerned. I shake my head. 

“No hunger. Too much nervous”. 

And now Harry is smiling gently at me. 

“You will be fine”, he says, no doubt in his voice. “It is not like you haven’t done it before”, Harry jokes, and I feel better that he can find something funny in this story. 

“You mean catching the Snitch before Cho Chang? I can handle it”, I say, sharing the joke. Harry blinks, seeming surprised. 

“Cho? I had forgotten…” And when I look curiously at him, he blushes. “I didn’t remember you would be playing against Cho. In fact -”, Harry looks at the fire, avoiding my eyes. His voice sounds amused. “it’s been a while since I last thought about her”. 

“Oh”, I exclaim, without really knowing how to respond to this. There is a warm feeling inside me, as if I had just finished a loop on a broomstick. “And is this good?” 

“I think so”, Harry replies softly, and, for a few minutes, we stay in silence. It is not uncomfortable. “Shouldn’t you be going?” 

“I am trying to calculate the time so I can find the team directly in the field”, I explain, and Harry nods, upset. “You will be missed, you know”, I say, trying to comfort him. “You are our best player”. 

There is a small amusement in his eyes now. 

“Well, I know a Chaser who is pretty good, actually, but I won’t tell you who she is. Don’t want it to get over her head”. 

“I will try not to”, I promise, and then, as if it is the easiest thing in the world, we are both sharing a smile. Then Harry grimaces. 

“At least you will have company”, he says, his eyes analyzing any movement in my face. “Dean, I mean”. 

“What about him?”, I ask, confused. 

“Maybe you can get back together”, he says, almost against his wish, his face serious. His suggestion is so off and unlikely any thought that has been on my mind since Harry last told us he would not be playing, that I pause, unsure on how to answer this. However, Harry seems to think the worst of it, because he turns his eyes away from me. 

“I wouldn’t want it”, I say hurriedly, then I take a deep breath. “It is been a while since I think about Dean”, I add, more softly. 

“Oh”. 

The sound seems to escape Harry’s mouth, and, even though he is not looking in my direction, I can see the shadow of a smile in his lips. 

“I have something for you”, he says suddenly. “Just give me two minutes”. 

And before I can say anything, he runs to his dormitory. As promised, two minutes later, Harry is back, grinning, holding his broom. 

“Take it”, he says, offering me the Firebolt. I gasp. 

“Harry -”

“And this”, he adds, showing the captain’s badge. 

“Harry, I - really, your Firebolt? And maybe Katie was a better choice -”

“It is just a loan”, he explains, interrupting me. “Not that you need a faster broom to win, but I thought it was a good idea”. And when I still hesitate, Harry blinks. “This way, it’s like I _am_ there in the game with you”. 

This breaks me. I will not deny Harry any chance to feel more present with us, part of a team he captained so well in the past months, so I take the broom he is offering. 

“And like I said, you are the best player, so this badge is yours”. Harry presents the captain’s badge as if he would like to pin it on me, but he blushes when his eyes fall on my chest. “Maybe you should pin it”. 

I blush too, and, without really thinking about it, I pin the captain’s badge on my blouse. When I look back at him, I met Harry’s eyes; there is a warmth in his eyes that I’ve never seen before. 

“Thank you”, I say slowly. “I will try to make you proud”. 

He nods absently, his eyes shining so much that Hermione’s words ring back, with more confidence than ever. _Harry likes you._

“Good luck on the game”, he says. I try to smile in gratitude, but the smile is off. I don’t know how to react to Harry’s stare. 

“I should go”, I say instead. 

“You should”, he agrees, but he doesn’t move, and I stay, unable to walk away. Suddenly, even though the timing doesn’t seem right, even though there is a sadness in the air because Harry will not going with me - with us - today, all I can think is of kissing Harry - maybe I just need this one moment of crazy, blissful happiness -

“Ginny?”, the voice of Hermione distracts me, and I blink, backing away from Harry. When I turn, I see that Hermione is standing by the portrait, looking from me to Harry, her face pink. “Sorry – I mean - Ron is calling you”. 

“I’m going to see him”, Harry says, and his eyes lock with mine one last time before he exits the room. 

Hermione sighs. 

“I interrupted something, didn’t I?”, she asks sorrowfully. “I am really sorry, I didn’t know -”

“It was nothing”, I say, smiling kindly. “It wasn’t the right time - also - I owe you an apology. I am sorry for yesterday, I should not have yelled at you, I was just so angry with Harry’s detention, and Malfoy and Snape and -”

“Quidditch”, Hermione grumbles, even though she has a small smile. “I have learnt by now that Quidditch can really upset people, mostly if you are a Weasley”. I laugh, then I hug her with my free arm. She looks at the Firebolt in my hand. “So, what was happening between you and Harry?” 

I remember the look on his face before she entered, and it occurs to me that I maybe I wasn’t the only one wanting for a moment of happiness. 

“Nothing”, I answer truthfully. “But I have a good feeling about today”. 

  


**V.**

  


I don’t remember starting to run, but I know I am running because there is wind in the Common Room and the faces of people are out of focus. Or maybe I am just not seeing them - because I have eyes only for the man who has just entered the room, the one I most wanted to see since I’ve felt the Golden Snitch locked in my fingers one hour ago. 

So, despite being on a run, I can see every aspect of his face, from his scar to his jaw. I can see the shape of his lips, the way he seems slightly out of breath, and the green in eyes - I leave his eyes for last and I am glad I do it, because his eyes hold my attention. They are shining like I have never seen before. Harry looks determined. 

And suddenly I feel it as well. Suddenly I feel more connected with Harry than ever, so it feels like the easiest thing in the world to throw my arms around his neck, my feet raised so our faces are at the same height. 

For one moment, everything stops, and we just look at each other. 

And then Harry is kissing me, without a single drop of question in the way his lips move against mine, as if he knows this is _right_ as much as I do. And I kiss him back, all uncertainty leaving me. 

Because feeling the heat of his lips makes me feel light - even though my skin is burning and my heart is beating faster than ever, all silly fear I had that Harry might not like me is replaced by a gentle serenity. We were _made_ to be together, and I know that, somehow, everything has led us to this moment - Michael, Dean, Cho, none of it ever mattered. 

It feels natural the way we kiss, like we had practiced it before, just to get it right at this time. I know the moment I should lean closer to him or the moment to let him lift me slightly, and I know the moment that we should stop - but this does not make me anxious or annoyed, just full of patience. 

So, very slowly, I break apart. I smile at him, dizzy, and Harry smiles back at me with the same expression: as if not believing it has finally happened. His eyes burn into mine, and I realize this is not the first time he stares at me with this intensity; but this is the first time I understand and share the tenderness and adoration in his eyes. 

And then there is a sudden explosion of sounds around us, and I startle - I had all but forgotten about the other people in the Common Room. For all I knew, the world had ended, and me and Harry were the only survivors. But, as I look around, I can see that Hermione is smiling happily (and knowingly), Neville is clapping, Dean looks shocked while Seamus pats his back, Colin is taking pictures, most of the girls are looking murderous and Ron -

I never felt the need to justify whoever I kiss for Ron, but I know that my brother’s opinion matters to Harry - and as much as I want to kiss Harry again, I also do not want to be the cause of distress between then. But after a beat, Ron nods, almost exchanging a smile with Harry, and I realize that I do care about Ron’s opinion, because I want him to be happy that his younger sister is together with his best mate. 

Harry turns to me, lightly, as if Ron’s approval lifted a heavy weight from his shoulder. He indicates the portrait and takes my hand; I admire once more how well our hands feel intertwined and together, we leave the Common Room. 

We take a few steps, and, as soon as the portrait closes behind us, he stops. He takes my hand and raises it to his lips, kissing the back of my hand, his eyes never breaking contact with mine; his other hand touches my face, and I want to drown in the feeling of his touch. 

“Ginny”, Harry whispers, and I love the way my name sounds on his lips. “I think I will kiss you now”. 

I smile, putting my hands around his neck, which makes him shiver. I like this reaction. 

“You didn’t warn me before”, I reply teasingly. 

“And I am so _sorry_ for that”, he jokes. 

“Prat”, I say without any malice in my voice, and I take the last step closer to him. 

And then we are kissing again; in the few seconds I can think straight, I notice how different is to kiss Harry; nobody had ever made me feel so much happiness and quietness with one single touch. Maybe kissing Michael and Dean had been physically nice, but there was always something missing - now, with blood pumping furiously through my veins, I know what I always missed. Harry. 

I may have like them, but it never felt even remotely close to this. 

I feel like I am flying without lifting my foot off the ground. 

This time is the pure need for air that breaks us apart. We stay embraced, our foreheads touching each other, just breathing in and out. And then without any need for words, we separate, and we resume walking, heading for the grounds. 

The sun greets us as we walk until we find a tree by the lake to sit in its shadows. It is the nicest day of spring that I’ve ever seen; the sun shines in the water and there are birds singing. Even though I know this, I don’t register anything but Harry, whose eyes are fixed on me. 

“I like you”, Harry confesses, sounding timid for the first time. I beam, squeezing his hand, and he seems more confident. “I don’t know exactly when it - my feelings - started, but I know when I first noticed it. That day we saw you kissing Dean, it was like all thoughts left my head and suddenly I realized that I did not want you kissing anyone else”. 

Harry is frowning. I touch his face and his expression softs. 

“Since then, all I have thought about was to kiss you. It has been driving me crazy”. His hand plays with my hair. “I dreamed a lot of you”. 

There is a warm feeling spreading through my body. 

“Well, it is a good thing I am happy to make your dreams come true”, I reply, before kissing him softly in the lips. It is a delicate touch, but my lips are tingling by the time I break apart. “I like you too, which I think you noticed by now”, I say, making him laugh. “Not since the first time I heard your story, not since you saved me… I don’t know how or why, but it’s been quite a while since I know I fancy you, Harry”. 

His eyes shine, as if he cannot believe it to be true yet. 

“You’re smarter”, he says brightly, kissing the top of my head. 

“I did have to wait longer”, I ponder, without any real concern in my voice. Ever since we first kissed, I knew every moment of waiting were worth it. “Not that I regret it”. 

“Hmmm - I am glad”, Harry replies honestly. He kisses me again, making us lay on the grass. I am taking heavy breathes when we break apart, my chest raising and falling as if I have just run miles. 

I hug him, placing my head over his beating heart. Harry smiles in response, and this sight makes me one thousand times happier than any victory in a Quidditch game could ever make me. 

  


**VI.**

  


It is only the rumbling of his stomach that interrupts our kiss. 

“Oops”, Harry says, his cheek reddening. I slap my forehead, feeling stupid. 

“Harry! I am sorry, I totally forgot that you didn’t lunch”. 

“Well, I wasn’t minding much”, he replies slyly, and then Harry is making that face that I know by now that it precedes a kiss. I also know that if he kisses me once more, we will forget about dinner for a long time, and while the Weasley in me, for once, does not care for food, I remind myself that he hasn’t eat since breakfast. 

“Come on”, I say instead, getting up and offering him my hand. Harry takes it, still smiling happily. 

The touch of his hand over mine is one of the most innocent touches we’ve shared all afternoon, but it still makes me feel on fire. 

We enter the Great Hall together, and my eyes immediately find Ron, sitting in the middle of the Gryffindor table. He looks serious, but Hermione is by his side, smiling quietly, so I suppose things must be fine. Harry glances at Ron as well, and other than him raising his eyebrow, Harry seems unaffected - I guess he is feeling safe in the Great Hall with all witnesses around us - I mean, if Dumbledore expects Harry to be the Chosen One, he surely would avoid murder by a pissed best friend, right? 

“Nice afternoon?”, Hermione asks, when we sit in front of her. Her lips are twitching. 

Harry nods, undisturbed. 

“The very best”, he answers, starting to serve himself. “And yours?” 

“Not as good, I guess”. 

“Of course not, if Ron’s been angry all day”, I ponder. My comment makes Ron uncross his arms. 

“I am not annoyed”, he replies, sounding really calm. This surprises me. “I am just waiting for you to finish your dinner”, Ron adds, again surprising me when I notice he is not eating anything. 

“Oh”. Harry stops, evidently finding Ron’s lack of appetite a bad sign. “You will be giving me a speech, won’t you?” 

Ron shrugs. 

“There will be a speech”, he acknowledges, exchanging a glance with Hermione. She nods, encouraging him, and Ron looks satisfied with himself. “I just won’t say anything now, because -”, he raises his voice, “- it doesn’t concern anyone”. 

And indeed, when I look round, I see there’s more and more people looking at me and Harry, whispering between themselves, some of them even raising in their seats to get a better look at us. Harry doesn’t seem much annoyed about all these glances, but when our eyes met, he grimaces. 

“I am sorry about this”, he says in a low voice. I smile quietly. 

“I caught the Golden Snitch, Harry, it’s me they are staring”, I joke, and as expected, Harry laughs. Even my brother manages a smile. “Which reminds me, I think I should return this to you”. I give him the captain badge. “It looks better on you, _captain”._

Harry gives me a smile so bright that, of course, Ron decides to intervene. He fakes a cough; Hermione gives him a warning look, perhaps sensing that I am close to hexing my brother. 

“There are too many people here”, he observes, and I am obliged to agree with him for once. “You wouldn’t want to make a scene”. 

Hermione giggles. 

“Yes, because it is not like they’ve done it before”. 

Ron rolls his eyes. 

When at least Harry and I finish our dinner, Ron rises, looking expectantly at us. I shrug, but I also rise, my hand firmly holding Harry’s as we follow Ron and Hermione out of the Great Hall. 

Hermione is whispering something to Ron, but he just shakes his head. 

“Don’t worry, I know what to do”, he says confidently. Harry looks half-concerned and half-amused. 

“Do you think I might have to flee the country?”, he asks seriously. 

“Only if Ron doesn’t enjoy having all parts of his body”, I reply innocently. 

Harry laughs. 

“Quid agis”, Hermione says, but the portrait doesn’t open. The Fat Lady looks at me and Harry, all smiley. 

“Oh, I can’t believe you are finally together! I have always said to Violet that you would make the most beautiful couple; it just reminds me so much of James and Lily! I am so _thrilled_ for you!” 

“Yeah, we are all thrilled”, Ron agrees, with a grimace. “Now can you open it?” 

“Hum, Lily did not have an annoying brother”, the Fat Lady grumbles, opening the portrait. 

“You didn’t meet her sister”, Harry murmurs darkly, and when I hug him lightly, his expression softs. 

The Common Room is almost empty. Ron choses the emptiest place in the room for us to sit; I perch myself in the armrest of Harry’s chair, my hand playing with his hair, in that way I’ve discovered this afternoon that he enjoys. Harry shots me a warning look, as if asking me not to disturb Ron, but I ignore the warning. The goosebumps erupting around his neck show me that I’ve won this argument. 

Ron takes a deep breath. 

“I need to talk with you”, he says surprisingly calm. Harry sighs. 

“I know”. 

“Not with you”. Ron rolls his eyes. “With my sister”. 

“With me?”, I ask, exchanging a bewildered look with Harry. 

“Yes, you. You ended your relationship just a month ago -”, he starts, and I cannot help but to interrupt him. 

“So did you”, I remind him. The tip of Ron’s ears reddens. 

“But I haven’t snogged anyone today”. 

“I am so sorry for you, Ron”, I reply seriously, making Harry chuckle. 

“There is still time”, he says, looking pointedly at Hermione. She blushes. 

“Hey! I have been on your side for months!” 

Ron looks back at her, surprised. 

“You _knew_ about them?” 

“Oh, Ron - It is not my fault if you haven’t seen Harry pinning for Ginny, but it’s been obvious for a while. I mean, how many times can someone really discuss Quidditch so late in the night?” 

Ron appears stunned, as if the concept of over discussing Quidditch is unfathomable to him. 

“Anyway”, he starts again, “my point is that Harry is an emotionally complicated person”. At this, Harry lifts his eyebrows. “And you had two boyfriends -”

“Harry had one”, I note. 

“Cho did not count much”, Hermione disagrees, exchanging a grim with Harry, who nods. 

“So, I just don’t want see you dumping him in one week”, Ron continues, undisturbed. “He has a gentle heart”. 

Harry and I share a glance. 

“Er - thank you, Ron, I suppose”, he says, slight uncertain, and Ron smiles at him before pointing a finger to him, looking severe. 

“But if you break her heart, it is you who will need to worry about having all parts of your body”. 

Harry nods gravely, but I laugh. 

“Yes, because You-Know-Who will look like child’s play compared to my brothers”. 

Harry puts his hand around my waist, bringing me as close to him as I know he would dare in front of Ron. 

“Hey, I bet Fred and George know together more hexes than Voldemort ever dreamed of”. 

I pretend to look thoughtful. 

“So basically, Bill would lock you in a pyramid, Charlie would feed you to dragons and Percy might bore you to death with talk about leaky cauldrons… Well, you should watch out for this heart of mine, Harry James Potter”. 

He smiles, coming closer to me; then he stops and turns to Ron. 

“I am going to kiss your sister”, Harry says calmly, making my heart speed up. “I don’t think you will want to see this”. 

And without waiting for an answer, he kisses me. Distantly, I hear Ron grumbling. 

“At least this time there was a warning”. 

  


**VII.**

  


Ron is laughing hysterically by the time I join Harry in the Gryffindor table for lunch. I kiss Harry on the cheek, and, to my surprise, I see that Harry is blushing. 

“What happened?”, I ask, glancing round. 

“Harry had a little accident today in Potions class”, Hermione answers, amused. 

“It was magnificent”, Ron adds, with tears in his eyes. “The Slytherins were covered in blue powder, there was potion in the ceiling and Slughorn lost his hat in the explosion…”

Harry gulps, clearly embarrassed. 

“And you think Slughorn got angry?”, Ron continues. “Well, not with his favorite chosen one. He merely laughed and said…”

“I was just distracted”, Harry interrupts him, sounding even more embarrassed. I look at him questioningly, but he refuses to look me in the eyes. I turn to Hermione for answers, but she just shakes her head, looking fondly at Harry. 

I wait until after we are leaving the Great Hall, me and Harry falling behind them, to ask Harry quietly, “So, what really happened at the potions class?” 

“You know, what Ron told you”. 

I just look at him, until Harry blinks. 

“Slughorn said I was distracted because I was lovesick”, he admits. 

I allow myself one moment to enjoy the heat coming from his cheek before smiling. 

“Fortunately for you, I know exactly the cure for this sickness, Harry”, I say, standing on the top of my toes to kiss him on the lips. 

  


**VIII.**

  


My hand plays absently with Harry’s hair, messing it even more. 

I should be reading the Transfiguration book for the exams. That’s why we are not snogging right now; Harry promised he wouldn’t bother me, so instead of kissing me, he just laid down his head on my lap, letting me muss his hair with one hand, while the other just turned the pages on the book. For the past twenty minutes, it had worked. 

But then I looked at his face; there was a quiet smile there. I’ve been closer to him more than enough these past few days to almost memorize each aspect of his face, but there is something else today, something I’ve never really associated with Harry before. 

It reminds me of one of those lazy days in summer, when the sun is high and the sky is blue, without any clouds. Because this is how Harry looks now. Like he is just one happy teenager, without any worries in the world - as if there is no war, no Dark Lord, no Chosen Ones. Like he is in peace. I wish he would be more at ease like this. Except that he can’t. 

The injustice of it all makes me want to scream or - or to go and destroy Tom with my bare hands. But I know that it is not in my power to do this; I don’t believe much in destiny, but I know that, somehow, it’s Harry who will finish this. It is not fair - he is just a boy, isn’t he? -, but I understand Harry enough to see he would not want it any other way. 

And I promise myself that I will be by his side, no matter what. 

But for now, I just place a light kiss on the top of Harry’s head (he smiles) and, just like him, I let myself enjoy this one moment of peace. 

  


**IX.**

  


My eyes are almost closing; I shake my head, trying stubbornly to keep focus, but there is nothing in the last goblin war that can keep my interest enough for me to read one more page…

And then there is movement next to me; Harry pulls the chair next to me, sitting, then he lays his head on my shoulder. 

“Hello”, I say softly, hearing him breathing heavily. 

“I’ve missed you”, Harry replies, his voice gently. His breath in my neck makes me tremble. “Sleepy?” 

“Not anymore”, I answer resolutely, turning to him and kissing him as if we were not in the library. “I’ve missed you too”. 

He sighs heavily, looking tortured. I glance at my watch. It’s well past two afternoon; I curse Snape silently, for keeping Harry so long on his detention. It is like that old bat knows how little time Harry and I have together, and he is taking pleasure in keeping us apart as much as he can. But, well, weekends are really the only days we can be together without classes…

“How are the goblins?”, Harry asks, indicating the book in front of me. I roll my eyes. 

“In war, of course”. I sigh. “Have you eaten already?” 

He shakes his head, distractedly. His hand touches my face, as if he needs to feel closer to me. As if he is also sorry for our short weekend. 

This decides it for me. I close my book and start to gather my things. 

“Let’s go. Let’s have a picnic by the lake”. 

“Don’t you have to study?”, he asks concerned, though he is already up. 

“Only Bill and Percy ever passed History of Magic, my mom won’t care. And besides, we _need_ to enjoy this chance”, I lower my voice, as if sharing a secret. “If Hermione were here, she would never approve it”. 

Harry laughs. 

Thirty minutes later, after a short trip to the kitchens, we are by the lake, on the shadow of our favorite beech tree, serving grapes to each other. 

“This is _so much better_ than goblins”, I say, resolutely. Harry grins. 

“Definitely”, he agrees, abandoning the grapes and leaning closer to kiss me. 

I can taste the sweetness of the grapes on his lips and I am so distracted by this that it is only we break that I notice that Harry is fully laying on the grass, and I am on top of him. 

“Hmm”, I say, blushing slightly. “I think you look very fragile in this position, Harry”. 

“I don’t mind”, he whispers, raising his hand to touch my neck. I expect him to draw me closer, but he just draws lines on my skin, burning it with his touch. “I am at your mercy”. 

“Funny how it seems the opposite”, I murmur. I try to kiss him, but Harry diverts, kissing my neck instead. 

“I don’t think you mind either”, he jokes. 

At this point I am not sure about what I mind or don’t mind. All I know is that even though I am above him, I feel completely at _his_ mercy: he is still kissing my neck, while his hands are drawing circles in my back, having just found a breach in my shirt. And then, with much more precision than I would have expected, Harry opens two buttons of my shirt, holding my hip. Every place he touches make my skin burn. 

“Oh, I hate you”, I say weakly, which makes him chuckle. 

“Really?” 

“If you don’t kiss me right now, yes”. 

Harry laughs again, and the sound of his laughter makes me wish that he could be more carefree; then his lips find mine and all thoughts leave my head, except that it is obvious for both us that I don’t hate him. 

In fact, I have the impression that what I feel for him is the opposite of hate. 

  


**X.**

  


The phoenix song is still echoing through Hogwarts. I look up to the ceiling of by bed, trying to find patterns that are not there, while ignoring the whispers of my roommates. At least, I give up. I am not sleepy, and I don’t want to stay longer in this room. The phoenix song brings too many memories - from laying in the Chamber of Secrets to seeing Dumbledore’s body, looking almost serene in the floor. 

I don’t want to think about anything right now. 

I just wish I could be with Harry. 

I take a coat and I leave the dormitory. My friends look at me, eyes alert, but they don’t try to stop me, even though it’s almost three in the morning. Still, I ignore them; they’ve tried to question me early, and then I almost hexed them - I didn’t want to explain how it was fighting against Death Eaters, with fear that the lucky potion would be running out at any time, or seeing my brother’s bloody face, Dumbledore’s body, or Harry looking so lost –

Almost as if he could read my mind, Harry is already there when I reach the Common Room; or maybe I just know him enough to know he would also not be sleeping either. He doesn’t seem surprise when his eyes find mine, and he just gets up, waiting for me in front of the fireplace. 

I fit into his arms perfectly, tiny as I am, and Harry kisses my forehead. His arms are holding me firmly, almost hurting me, but I don’t care - I know that there is something in this hug that’s been giving me some comfort, and I am just glad to be able to be here for him in this moment. Merlin knows he deserves a break, and not just for today. 

“I need you”, he whispers distraughtly, and I detach myself from his arms just enough to look him in the eyes. 

“I am here”, I answer gravely, but Harry doesn’t seem to hear. 

His lips are set into a thin line, unsmiling. I don’t like the look on his face; it brings me a growing feeling of fear and urgency. 

Harry is looking at me like if he needs to remember every aspect of my face - as if he is going to leave and not come back. 

“I need you too”, I say, and there is the same distraught in my voice now. But Harry doesn’t answer, so I feel something pressing my chest. 

The understanding hits me like a lightning strike. 

_Harry is going to leave me._

Harry has a long way ahead of him - a dark, difficult way - and I cannot be part of this journey. It is not about being young or inexperienced, it is only that Harry cannot risk anyone else. This is about him and Voldemort. 

And of course, Ron and Hermione won’t leave him. For a moment I feel the injustice of it in every bone of my body, but then it’s gone. At least Harry won’t be alone. 

He is only going to leave _me_.

Harry is still looking at me, serious, and I can see the pain in his green eyes. He opens his mouth, but no sound comes out. I know what he is going to say and though I want to fight it with everything I have, I know I won’t. I never expected any less of him. 

I love him for it. 

Maybe this is why it hurts so much. 

“Not now”, I say in a low voice, urgently. “Just a few more days -”

We have time until he is of age. We have three days until we leave Hogwarts. We do have time - why do it now, in the middle of the night, if for three more days we are safe? 

“Not now”, Harry agrees, and I see a tiny light of hope shining in his eyes. But when he kisses me, I feel the despair increase. 

Harry’s mouth is hungry, almost urgently - but I can understand. He is afraid, knowing just how much our time together is coming to an end. I know this is why his hand is bringing me even closer, and why his lips doesn’t want to leave mine. 

He doesn’t want to end this kiss; he doesn’t want to say goodbye. 

That makes us two. 

“We have time”, I promise, when we finally pause for air. Harry opens his eyes, nervous, but I return his look quietly. I could cry now, but I hate to be so emotional and Harry doesn’t handle emotional girls. 

I will deal with this future break up when the time comes. Harry seems to agree with me in this decision, because he smiles a little and kiss me softly on the lips. We sit on the couch together, with my head resting against his chest; I can hear his heart beating. 

Harry plays with my hair, breathing heavily in that way I know he is just inhaling the scent of my hair. He once said it was the most attractive scent in the world. This remembrance makes me smile sadly. 

I close my eyes, enjoying the heat from Harry’s body, and I let myself imagine a world in what this moment could last forever.


End file.
